Feels Like Home
by btvsna
Summary: Alice saw a vision of Jasper before they met. She waited for the love of her life for twenty years. My entry for the Peenaters Alice/Jasper Smut Contest.
1. Chapter 1

I was sitting in a small diner, watching the people around me, waiting for that someone in particular, waiting for _him_. I paid little mind to the patrons around me. Many looked at me too long, holding whispered conversations behind their papers that they did not know I could hear. I didn't pay attention, though. My eyes were trained on the door, waiting for him to walk in. I was becoming impatient. It wasn't uncomfortable, sitting on this stool, the delicious smells that had nothing to do with the grill in the back assaulting my senses. I had grown used to ignoring the smells, much like I ignored the voices I wasn't supposed to hear. I was sure I could stand on my head on the tall stool waiting for him to arrive and still be perfectly comfortable. It was actually a tempting thought, something to break the monotony, but I didn't think my fellow patrons would take too kindly to an acrobatic show. So, I remained as I was, making a conscious effort to cross my ankles and play with my hair, and watched the entrance.

Finally, he walked through the door. He was a perfect angel, the most beautiful boy I had ever laid eyes on. I knew every line and angle of his face, every scar, every hair. I wanted to follow all those lines with my fingers, committing them to physical memory as well. As he stepped through the door, his black eyes found mine, as if he knew I would be here as well. I felt a smile spread across my face as I hopped off the stool and walked to him, unable to keep the space between us.

"You've kept me waiting a long time," I said.

He ducked his lovely blonde head and spoke with a low Southern accent. "I'm sorry, ma'am."

I held out my hand to him, not wanting to restrain physical contact with him any longer. When he placed his hand in mine, it felt like home.

The feeling of love, happiness, and hope still swelled in me as the pain broke through. I gasped for breath as the pain took over. It was dark; the only sounds my racing heart and ragged breaths, the smells ranging from stale urine to my own perspiration. I fought the urge to scream as I was consumed by wave after wave of burning pain. I began to pray for a vision, the blonde god, a change in the weather, anything to take me away from the pain again. It felt like hours, or maybe minutes or days, before my mind drifted into another vision. This one was much simpler, just the beautiful boy and I sitting together, me in his arms, enjoying each other's company. The boy, Jasper, slowly, lovingly, ran his fingers through my short hair, murmuring softly in my ear. The vision was so beautiful that it made the next wave of pain almost tolerable.

As time crawled by, and as I continued to pray for more visions of my beautiful boy, Jasper, I started to see him with more frequency. The vision of the diner replayed several times, seeming to become clearer each time. There were other visions, glimpses of a family that felt like my own, but when I tried to focus on their faces they slipped away. Jasper's face came back to me, again and again, helping to ease my pain with his sweet smile and smooth voice.

I soon realized that while my visions were increasing, the pain was as well. At first, if I was having a vision, it was like my brain could not register the pain my body was feeling. Then, slowly, the pain started to prickle at me as I watched Jasper walk into the diner. It began to build as I saw Jasper and I streaking through a forest with inhuman speed. By the time I saw Jasper lightly touching his lips to my own the pain was so intense it was hard to concentrate on the visions.

Strangely, the stronger the pain became, the clearer the images became as well. It was as though my brain chose the worst moment possible to allow me to concentrate on everything at once. Not only was I hyperaware of the visions and my pain, but I could also hear my heartbeat in such detail it scared me. I was aware of the rapid _thumpa thumpa_ that I had heard from the beginning, but now I could hear the gentle liquid _woosh_ that I could only assume was the blood coursing through my body. I tried to ignore my heart and focus on the other sounds: a bird singing in the distance, the gentle thudding of an animal's paws nearby, a mouse perhaps.

As the pain began to withdraw from my fingers and toes and increase tenfold everywhere else, I was hit with another vision, this one much stronger than any before. It was of the family, _my_ family: Edward, Carlisle, and Esme. It seemed like there were supposed to be others, but I couldn't see them, not clearly. But I could see Carlisle, see him taking Jasper and I in with open arms. I could see Esme loving us as though we were her own children. And I could see Edward, running through the woods with Jasper and I, taking down and biting into a deer.

I cried out as the pain intensified again. My arms and legs were now free from the fire, but the pain that burned through my body was even more concentrated. I desperately searched for Jasper in my mind, clinging to his face when I found him, hoping his small smile would be enough to pull me through this terrible pain and into whatever would happen next.

My heart was thundering in my chest; even louder, even faster than before. I couldn't think of any sound to compare it to, even rushing hoof beats didn't stand up to the sound. Just when I thought it could go no faster, that the pain could be no worse, my heart gave one faltering beat, then another, then stopped entirely.

I held my breath, waiting. It was several long minutes before I realized that I still hadn't breathed, yet I felt fine. I forced myself to take a testing breath. I could taste the air around me. Not just the stale urine and perspiration, but the wood, the dirt outside, and some other smell I couldn't name, a scent that caused my throat to throb softly.

Before I could consider what all this meant, I was hit by another vision, the strongest yet. Carlisle. Suddenly I understood; everything made sense. I knew what I was, knew what I had to do. For the first time in God only knew how long, I opened my eyes. The sight before me almost made me cry. I was in some sort of hovel, a shack that seemed to barely be held together, that seemed to be in the middle of nowhere. The gentle sunlight that sifted in through the glassless window was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. It was like rainbows were dancing in the air, swaying and swirling with little pieces of pollen. I took in another deep breath, tasting the sweetness of the pollen, but also that other scent as well. My throat throbbed more urgently.

Before my brain had even fully thought of standing up, I was already at the door of the shack. I took another deep breath, trying to calm myself. I walked out the door, and into the woods.

If it was beautiful in the shack, it was stunning out here. I vaguely realized that I couldn't think of how else anything should look, but brushed it aside. At the moment, I had to focus on controlling the burn in my throat.

I sped through the forest, letting my senses guide me. I finally caught a scent that, while not entirely appetizing, smelled good enough. I knew it was what I was looking for. With a speed that a part of me noted I shouldn't be capable of, I flitted to the animal, springing on the deer's back and taking it down. It struggled against me, horns and hooves flailing, but it did no good. Pressing my teeth to its warm neck, I bit through, sucking the blood into my mouth. When I was finished, I stood up, running a hand across my mouth. I walked forward, ready to follow another scent, when my eyes passed by the small pond just feet away. Walking toward it, my eyes trained on what had caught my attention, my breath caught.

I knew what I looked like. I had seen several visions of myself during the pain. But this, this reflection in the water, this was different. My short dark hair was matted and dirty. The long grey cloth that covered my body hung loosely around me, the sleeves several inches too long. It was dirty and tattered, stained with blood, crusted with other fluids I dared not name. My white skin was streaked with red from my recent kill. But none of this bothered me. It was my eyes. In all my visions, my eyes had been a lovely golden color, like an old whiskey. But here in the pond, my eyes were red. Bright red. Blood red. I whipped my head in the opposite direction, refusing to look at my reflection a moment longer. I wasn't sure why, but the color of my eyes bothered me. Instead, I took a deep breath, testing the air.

Suddenly, a scent assaulted my senses, even better than the deer. My eyes flashed open and I tore after it, not even thinking. The forest whipped by me, each leaf and pine needle distinct, but I saw none of it; I had to get to that scent.

Finally, I saw my prey. Moving so quickly it didn't even know I was there, I pressed my lips to its neck, biting down and letting the blood flood my mouth. Drinking deeply, I moaned at the taste. All too soon, it was over. And the reality of what happened crashed over me.

I looked down at the limp, lifeless man I held in my arms, his face frozen in an expression of horror.

Oh God, what had I done?

I heard a high pitch, unnatural sounding peal ring through the forest, again and again. It was a moment before I realized the sound was coming from me. I sat there on the forest floor, clutching the dead man to my chest, rocking him slowly as I cried tearless sobs. I wasn't sure how long I sat there, rocking the nameless man, trying to push aside my grief. I had killed someone. I was a murderer. This man, this man whose name I didn't know, had a family some where. And I took him away from them. Fresh sobs tore through me as I thought of his wife, wondering why he didn't come home for supper, of his children asking where daddy had gone.

When I finally stopped crying I stood up, trying to bring the man up with me. His body was stiff, unmoving, but he was exceptionally light. I ran with him through the forest and into the town. I deposited him in front of a small building, praying it was a hospital or police station and not a school, before returning to the forest. Once I was deep within the trees, far away from the tempting scents of society, I collapsed beneath a tree and sobbed once more, calling up Jasper's face in my mind. In my head, he held me in his arms, lightly brushing my hair away and telling me it would be all right.

I waited for Jasper for almost 20 years. The only thing that kept me going was the knowledge that one day he would walk into my life, the way he was meant to. I quickly learned how to interact with the humans without harming them. I would sneak into dress shops in the night and take clothing I needed, but otherwise I lived in the forest. I made an effort to hunt with regularity, always checking first to make sure no humans would cross my path.

Before long, I wanted more. I was learning how to focus and control my visions, and I started to use them to my benefit. I stole some money from a local shop, vowing to return it after I had made my investment. Then, focusing on the investment pages of a newspaper, I tried to figure out which option would be best. A fuzzy vision flashed through my mind, and trying to trust my instincts, I spent the money I had stolen. The return was amazing. This went on, allowing me to build up enough money to rent a small apartment with a large closet. I made short work of filling that closet with lovely clothes. Shopping made me happy, taking my mind off my slip-ups. So I shopped often.

I filled the time that I wasn't hunting or shopping trying to pull up visions of Jasper. Every time I saw his beautiful face I smiled. I was able to draw up more and more visions of him and me together. Jasper and I dancing. Jasper holding me in his arms. Jasper lowering his beautiful lips to my neck.

To the best of my knowledge, I had never been with a man. It didn't take me long to realize that before the burning pain, I remembered nothing. Sometimes, I wondered why that was, but mostly I didn't worry about it. I focused on today and tomorrow; yesterday was beyond my control.

One day, I was flipping through a catalogue in my favorite dress shop, looking at the new dresses that would be coming in. I about squealed when I flipped a page and saw a dress very similar to the one I was wearing in my vision of meeting Jasper.

"See something you like, Miss Alice?" the shop girl asked politely.

"This," I said, pointing to the dress in question. "Can I get this dress, but without the lace, and in emerald green?"

The girl looked at the dress I pointed to, then looked up at me. I noticed vaguely the pulse in her throat, the slight flush of her cheeks, and pushed the thought aside.

"Well," she began, slightly hesitant, "we might be able to. Green isn't one of the colors we can order it in. But maybe if Mrs. Harper puts in a special order…."

"Could she do that, do you think?"

"Well, she can try. I can't promise anything, though."

"That's all I can ask for." I smiled at her, causing her heart to stutter with fear. While I was sure the ladies who worked at this shop were terrified of me, they encouraged my business; I spent a lot of money here.

I sighed as the girl went to get Mrs. Harper. She placed a call to the designer, giving him my requests, then finally my measurements. After several minutes, she looked up at me.

"Oh, just a moment please," she said into the phone. Dropping the receiver to her side and placing her palm over the mouthpiece, she whispered to me, "He can do it, but it will be rather expensive."

"How expensive?" I asked, mirroring her volume. The price really didn't matter to me, but I figured if I played along, this might get over more quickly.

She hesitated a moment, then named a price. I nodded, telling her that was fine, and she confirmed the order with the man on the phone. I smiled slightly, thinking that this dress was going to be more expensive than three of my other dresses combined. It would be worth it, though.

I paid for the dress ahead of time, against Mrs. Harper's insistence, and scheduled a fitting for two months time. I all but skipped from the shop to my apartment, realizing that I would finally see Jasper in just over two months.

The dress, however, had other ideas.

I was just finishing off a rather tasty black bear when the vision hit me. My dress was going to be delayed, because some idiot at the shop out West didn't read the order and started using red fabric, not green. I growled in frustration, realizing that this was going to delay the dress by three additional weeks.

Sure enough, I got a call from Mrs. Harper two days later.

"Miss Alice? This is Emily Harper, from the dress shop on Elm. How are you today, dear?"

I struggled to keep my tone polite, knowing the reason for her call. This wasn't her fault, after all.

"I'm fine, Mrs. Harper. How are you? Enjoying the weather?"

Philadelphia had gotten four straight days of sunlight, something that was all but unheard of. While everyone else was enjoying it, it meant that I had to stay cooped up in my apartment during the day.

"Oh, of course, dear. I took my husband and children for a picnic in the park the other day. It was simply beautiful. And yourself? Are you enjoying all this sunshine?"

I smiled at her attempts to be kind.

"Yes, very much, I took a long walk just yesterday to soak it all up," I lied.

"That's nice dear. Well, you see, I'm calling because of your dress." She sounded very uncomfortable. "There was a slight problem with the fabric, you see, and it's going to take them a little bit longer than expected to get it straightened out."

"How much longer?" I kept my tone light, trying to let her know I didn't blame her for this. I think the poor woman would collapse if she lost my business. I had a feeling it was my frequenting the shop that was going to put her son through college.

"Three weeks, I'm afraid." Her tone suggested that she was telling me I only had three weeks left to live. "I'm so sorry, Miss Alice, if there's anything I can do to make this up to you—"

"Oh, Mrs. Harper, don't you apologize for a thing! I know this isn't your fault, not at all, and I won't have you apologizing for it. So my dress will be a little later than we thought, it's not the end of the world, and nothing to get upset over."

"Oh, well—I…" She didn't seem to know what to make of my lack of anger. Perhaps her other customers would have thrown a fit and demanded a refund, but I had waited long enough for this moment, three more weeks wouldn't kill me, although it was a frustrating inconvenience.

We spoke idle pleasantries for a few more minutes before saying our good-byes. To pass the time, I drew a hot bath and washed my hair. As I settled into the water, enjoying the sensation of the warmth against my skin, I let my thoughts drift to Jasper. I wondered what he was doing, and was quickly rewarded with a vision. He was slowly traveling north. My heart broke when I saw the look of pain and torment on his face, but I knew that as soon as he was in my arms, that would be gone.

As I toweled the moisture from my body, I searched for our new family. Two more members had joined Carlisle's clan since I first saw them, Rosalie and her mate Emmett, but some how it still didn't seem complete. I couldn't quite put my finger on what was wrong. Perhaps it was because Edward was alone while everyone else was paired off. I liked Edward already, and I knew we would be close. I rubbed the towel through my hair briskly, bouncing with excitement, knowing that Jasper and I would be with them soon enough. The clothing we wore in my vision of meeting our family was different, not like anything that was in style as yet. But I could tell from the lines of my skirt and Esme's dress that the date wasn't terribly far off. I giggled as I dressed. Leave it to me to date a vision through fashion.

When my dress finally arrived, I couldn't suppress my glee. I bounced around the shop like a child, hardly able to stand still as Mrs. Harper zipped up the back. She met my eyes in the mirror and smiled at me, rubbing my arms with her hands. They had long since stopped remarking about how cold I always was.

"Dear, you really are a sight."

"I know." My voice was breathy and I didn't care if I sounded conceited, I was too happy to finally have this last piece before Jasper. "I'm going to meet the man of my dreams while wearing this." I'm not sure why I told her, but I just really wanted to connect to another person at that point. She just smiled at me.

"Honey, the way you look in this dress, I wouldn't be at all surprised."

I smiled, then turned to her, pulling her into a quick hug. I released her almost as quickly, before she could finish her squeak of surprise. It had been years since my last slip-up, but she smelled too tasty for her own good and I didn't want to tempt my luck.

"Do you mind if I wear it out?" I asked. I knew she wouldn't, but it seemed polite to ask.

She gave me another small smile, still slightly surprised by my physical display before.

"Of course not, dear. Would you like me to box up the dress you wore in?"

"Please."

As she turned to take my clothes up to the counter to be wrapped up, I had a sudden flash of a vision. Jasper was almost in Philly. Today was the day. I gasped.

_Today Jasper will find me and then I will never have to be without him again_, my mind screamed.

I bounced happily to the counter, in an even brighter mood than before. Mrs. Harper handed me my wrapped dress and I thanked her for her services, forcing a large tip on her for her assistance.

When I skipped out on to the sidewalk, I turned my face happily to the sky. The dark grey clouds hung low over the city, threatening the impending rain but not yet releasing it. I knew that if I walked quickly home, I would have just enough time to drop off my old dress then make my way to the diner before the rain began.

I whistled as I walked, the passing people smiling at me instead of just looking at me in awe, as was customary. I opened the door to the diner and walked in just as the first raindrop fell. Depositing myself on my seat I ordered a cup of coffee, just to keep the cook from throwing me out, and turned toward the door and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

I looked at my watch impatiently. Four hours had passed since I settled myself in, and the cook was giving me dirty looks. Finally, I asked for the check for my coffee, then set three tens on top of it, telling him to keep the change. His eyes bugged out slightly, probably wondering if I was crazy, but he stuffed the bills in his pocket and walked away, leaving me to stare once more at the door.

I noticed as the light shifted slightly and my breath caught. This was almost exactly how the vision looked when Jasper finally walked in. I noticed that I was breathing heavily in anticipation, but I didn't care.

Finally, after years of seeing this moment, years of waiting for it, I watched as Jasper walked into the diner. He was more beautiful than my visions ever were. My breath caught slightly as I looked at him, at long last. I couldn't help the stupid grin that spread across my face as our eyes met.

I hopped off the stool and had to stop myself from running and flinging myself into his arms. Instead, I focused on walking slowly to him, trying to project my feelings out to him so he would know I wasn't a threat. When I reached him, I looked up into his eyes, black rimmed in crimson, and smiled.

"You've kept me waiting a long time," I said.

He ducked his lovely blonde head in apology. "I'm sorry, ma'am." His deep voice with its Southern lilt was like music to my ears.

I held out my hand to him, unable to restrain physical contact with him any longer. When he placed his hand in mine, it felt just like I knew it would: like home.

"Let's get out of here, shall we?" I asked, my voice hardly above a whisper.

He inclined his head again, this time in agreement, and followed me as I lead the way through the rainy streets.

We walked slowly, hand in hand, and the streets seemed empty. The world was empty. It was just Jasper and I, no one else mattered.

I peppered him with questions, how long it had taken him to get here from Texas. What he had seen along the way. Several times I took to walking backward, our hands still joined, so I could watch him as he answered me. He simply looked at me with a bemused smile ghosting his lips, answering each of my questions in his quiet voice. If he wondered how I knew so much about him, he didn't ask. Finally, after a little over an hour, he asked me a question.

"If you don't mind my asking, ma'am—"

"Alice," I corrected. "Please call me Alice."

He smiled down at me.

"Alice." The way he said my name made my heart swell.

"Jasper," I said, my voice breathy. His smile grew slightly.

"If you don't mind my asking, Alice, where are we walking to?"

I smiled up at him.

"The forest, silly."

This seemed to confuse him.

"Why are we going into the forest?"

I turned to him. We were now far away from the city, on the edge of the forest where I liked to hunt. Reaching my hand up, I gently touched the circles under his eyes. He seemed to flinch slightly at my touch at first, but then relaxed. I almost thought he leaned into my fingers.

"You're thirsty," I whispered, letting my fingers linger on his cheek.

His closed his eyes, whether at my touch or my statement, I wasn't sure. I took the moment to give into my desire to run my fingers through his hair, what I could reach of it. He groaned slightly at my touch and I felt a new thirst, a new desire course through me. Straining up as far as my small frame would allow me, I pulled his face down to meet mine. When our lips met, it was like nothing else. His lips were soft and firm, and seemed to fit perfectly against my own.

With a sharp hiss, Jasper sucked in a surprised breath, but his hands flew to my face, one burrowing in my hair, holding me to him. He slowly moved his lips against mine, once, twice. I moaned against his mouth. This, too, was better than any vision. I whimpered softly when he pulled away from me.

"I'm so sorry, Alice," he said softly, his head down. "I shouldn't have done that. It's not right of me to take advantage."

I looked at him incredulously. "You didn't take advantage. I kissed you!"

He looked up at me, shamed faced. "Still—"

I placed my fingers on his lips, cutting him off. "Not another word, Mr. Whitlock. I will not have you ruining this moment for me."

He smiled against my finger, but said nothing.

"Good, now let's hunt."

His face fell slightly.

"I would really rather wait a little longer. I think I can go a few more days—"

I cut him off with my finger again. I had seen how he hated hunting humans, how he tried to keep from feeding as long as possible, but always ended up breaking in the end. I had seen the pain this caused him. If at all possible, I would keep him from feeling that pain ever again.

"Do you trust me?" I asked, and my voice sounded strangely husky.

The bemused expression crossed his face once more.

"Oddly enough, I do."

I smiled back up at him, letting myself get lost in his eyes for a moment. Just when I was about to turn to drag him into the forest, Jasper tugged my hand gently. I turned to see him lift it to his lips, pressing them softly to the back of my hand, just above my fingers. I shuddered in pleasure.

"Thank you," he whispered huskily.

"For what?" I asked, my voice breaking slightly. I noticed I had taken a step closer to him. Our chests were almost touching, both rising quickly with our shallow breaths.

"I just have a feeling like you are saving me here."

He lifted the hand that wasn't holding mine to brush a strand of hair out of my face, letting his fingers linger against my cheek. I moaned softly, leaning into his touch. His hand was gone, though, all too soon, and I was forced back to reality.

"Right," I said, clearing my throat. "To the forest."

And I ran, his hand clutched in mine, in search of something to eat. I heard him chuckle, turned to see him shaking his head in amusement, and quickened my pace.

Finally, after we were several miles into the forest, I found what I was looking for. Letting go of his hand, I sprung quickly, catching the deer by his antlers. I held him out at arms length, not wanting to ruin my dress, and looked at Jasper.

"Come on, dinner time!"

He sent me a look, part confused, part disgusted.

"You want me to eat _that_?"

"No, silly, I want you to admire its natural beauty. Of course I want you to eat it. Preferably, before it ruins my new dress."

Jasper stepped closer to me, looking between the buck and my face like he thought I was crazy. _He wouldn't be the first person to think so._ I pushed the idle thought away, not fully understanding it.

"It doesn't smell very good," he said, his nose slightly wrinkled.

"Well, it honestly doesn't taste the best, either, but it does the job. Quells the thirst without the guilt."

Jasper looked at me briefly, some emotion ghosting across his face that I couldn't place. With a sigh and a martyred expression, he finally took the buck's antlers from me before pressing his teeth to the deer's neck. As he drank, he looked up over the deer's fur, his eyes meeting mine. My breath caught and I felt a rush of moisture pool between my legs. There was something so erotic about the way he looked at me that had me breathing erratically. He quickly looked away, forcing me to try to get myself under control.

After a few minutes he stood back up, the buck drained.

"How was it?" I asked, my voice not sounding quite right.

"It tasted terrible, but it helped some," he said, running his hand over the back of his mouth.

I reacted before I thought. I reached out, taking the hand he and just wiped his mouth with, and lifted it to my lips. Using my tongue, I collected the smear of blood transferred there from his mouth. I heard him growl softly and looked up, licking my lips. His eyes weren't as black as before, more a dark garnet color. But they had a different darkness to them. They looked hungry and they roved over my face.

I bit my bottom lip softly, about to apologize for my brazenness, when I felt the tree behind me connect with my back. Jasper was pressed against me, every angle of his body curved to match my own, and his lips were pressing forcefully to mine. His hands were on my face, in my hair, at my waist, seemingly everywhere at once. I twined my fingers through his hair, pulling his face closer to mine, and pressed my body closer to his. He growled again before thrusting his tongue into my mouth, battling it against my own.

I moaned loudly, trying to pull myself closer to him. There was too much in the way, I wanted, _needed_ more contact. Releasing his hair, I moved my hands to his chest to undo the buttons there, but before I could finish pushing the first button through its hole, Jasper pulled away from me, my wrists in his hands. His expression was pained.

"I am so sorry, Alice. I should not have done that. It was ungentlemanly of me. I swear, I'm not normally this much of a cad."

I was breathing heavily, watching the way his lips moved, wondering why he stopped, when it hit me.

_Oh, God!_

I was behaving like a harlot. I had only met this man, actually met him, a few hours ago, and already I was trying to undress him in the woods to feed my own carnal desires. What did that say of me? Of who I was? Maybe I was a prostitute before, maybe that was why I was so desperate to get Jasper out of his clothes. I leaned back against the tree behind me, unable to support my own weight.

"Jasper, I am so sorry," I whispered as the shame stole over me.

Jasper pulled me into his arms, resting my head against his chest and placing his cheek on the top of my head.

"No, darlin', don't. Please don't be ashamed. You've nothing to be ashamed of." He stroked my hair, speaking in a soothing voice. I clung to him like a man at sea clutching a life preserver. He held me like that, crooning reassurances in his beautiful voice into my ear, for quite some time. After the sun set I pulled away, smoothing my dress.

"Why don't we get you some more to eat, then we can head back to my place and you can clean up."

I offered Jasper a small smile, still feeling slightly ashamed over my actions. Not wanting to let me wallow, he walked over to me, taking my hands in his own, and pressed a small kiss to my temple.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea, Alice."

I smiled at the sound of my name on his tongue and tried to push all other feelings aside. It wasn't as though I was a harlot, I told myself as Jasper took down his third deer. After all, I had been having visions of him for 20 years. I knew I was going to fall in love with him, and he with me, and while I wasn't there yet, something in my heart told me it wouldn't be long. There was something about the way he held my hand, the way he looked at me when he took down the black bear that just made my heart swell. Looking at him, even if I didn't have my visions, I knew that we would spend the rest of our days together. And there was something in the way that Jasper's fingers brushed my cheek, the look in his eyes when they met mine that made me think that he knew it too. He drained the bear and walked to me, reaching for my hand.

"Are you ready to leave?" he asked in his soft, lilting voice.

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak, and we ran, hand in hand, back to my apartment.

I waited for him to finish cleaning up on my couch, my eyes trained on the bathroom door. He had laughed—possibly the most beautiful sound in the world—when I showed him my closet.

"You know, darlin', I think this is supposed to be a bedroom."

"Oh, I know," I said, walking to the section I had filled for him. "I had to put in all the shelves and racks myself.

I picked him out a change of clothing and handed them to him. He raised his eyebrows as he took the clothes.

"I knew your size," I explained, leading him to the bathroom, "and that you wouldn't have any clothes with you, so I took the liberty to pick some up for you."

I smiled winningly as I placed a towel atop the pile he was holding. I looked up to his eyes, the dark red-gold color of the setting sun, and suppressed the urge to attack him again.

"Thank you," he said softly, "For—for everything."

I smiled in response, then pointed out everything he would need to clean up. When I heard water filling the tub, I deposited myself on the couch to wait. After several long minutes he opened the door, wearing the clean clothes I had given him and smelling like my soap. His blonde hair was darkened with moisture, the gentle waves hanging against his head. I wanted to run my fingers through them, so I folded my hands.

"Sit," I said softly, indicating the space on the couch next to me.

Slowly, he lowered himself down, his eyes never leaving my face.

"So," I said, trying to resist the urge to lick his perfectly full lips, "tell me everything."

"Everything?" He looked confused.

"Yes," I said, shifting closer to him. "I want to know everything about you. Do you have any human memories? What are they? How long have you been like this? How have you survived? Everything."

He looked at me as if weighing my request. After a moment, he sighed heavily and began telling me his life story.

We didn't move for days. He finished telling me about himself after the first two days. But, I had so many questions. How had he felt about the Civil War (or, as he called it, "the War of Northern Aggression")? Did he miss Maria? Peter and Charlotte? What was it like in the South, only coming out at night? After we covered what he had done with his life, I wanted to know what he wanted to do next. Where did he want to go? What did he want to see? My endless series of questions seemed to leave him equally bewildered and bemused. He answered them all, though, even the ones that I could tell caused him pain.

He told me in great detail about his gift, how he could "taste" people's emotions, and even project emotions out to make those around him feel a certain way. I asked what I tasted like, then immediately bowed my head in embarrassment.

"I have never felt the kind of emotions you give out. There's complete trust, though I've done nothing yet to earn it, and extreme compassion. The fleeting emotions every one experiences: embarrassment, humor, whatnot. But there's something else, something I can't name. It feels like," he placed his hand on his chest, over his still heart, "like a fullness here."

I ducked my head again in embarrassment. He was describing the ever growing love I was feeling for him. His head tilted slightly, not understanding my embarrassment.

"And you, my dear," he said, ducking his head slightly to meet my gaze. "_You_ taste sweeter than any Georgia peach I can remember."

If I was human, I would have blushed.

By the sixth day, both Jasper and I were terribly thirsty. Eyes like onyx, we made our way to the forest to hunt. I quickly looked ahead to be sure we wouldn't cross any humans hunting here, and when I was sure the coast was clear I took off, Jasper on my trail.

We made a game of it, trying to see who could catch the largest prey the fastest. I caught a large buck first, with Jasper catching a much smaller doe after me. This went on, with first him catching a larger animal, then me catching one better. As we ran through the forest, we would cris-cross together, playing as we hunted.

I was getting ready to pounce on another deer when suddenly Jasper tackled me from behind. We rolled over each other, down a hill and through a stream, stopping finally with him on top of me.

"Hey," he said, his voice husky.

"Hey yourself."

Slowly he reached up and tucked a lock of hair behind my ear. He let his fingers drift down my cheek and across my jaw, his thumb coming to rest on my lips. He ran his thumb slowly over my mouth and I noticed that his breathing, like my own, was very shallow.

"Alice," he said in that delicious husky voice.

"Yes, Jasper?" My voice sounded a tad too high.

"I just wanted to let you know that I want you too, but that I'm waiting because I want to get to know you a bit better, to spend some more time with you. I care about you enough that I don't want to disrespect you by just letting my animalistic urges take over."

I looked at him, eyes wide, and faintly noticed I had stopped breathing all together.

"I really do, you know," he said, tracing my bottom lip with the pad of his thumb. "Care about you, I mean. More than I ever have for anyone else."

That said, he pressed his lips to mine quickly before standing up and pulling me into his arms.

"Should we start heading back," he asked. "Or are you still thirsty?"

"No, I'm fine," I said in a small voice, still trying to digest his proclamation.

We continued back to my apartment in silence, moving at a leisurely pace, our fingers entwined. We took turns getting cleaned up and met back on the couch. This time it was Jasper's turn to ask me questions. He seemed concerned that I couldn't remember anything of my human life, but extremely curious about my visions. When I told him that my first memory was the vision of meeting him and how that and other visions of him helped me pull through my change, he smiled and brought my hand up to his lips. He kissed first the back of my hand, then my palm, then my wrist, before returning our hands to his lap and motioning for me to continue.

I told him about our future family, going into great detail about what I knew of their personalities and nuances. I was talking for two days when he paused when asking me a question.

"Alice…" He trailed off, looking hesitant.

"Yes, Jasper?" I squeezed his hand lightly.

"Would you mind terribly if I try something?"

"Of course not. What is it?"

He wasn't looking at be, but staring intently at our hands twined together in his lap. After a moment, he met my gaze. He moved slowly, very slowly, and pulled me around, so my back was against his chest. Then he leaned back, bringing me with him, so we were lounged across my couch, his arms snugly around my waist. Sighing deeply, he nuzzled his nose into my hair, breathing me in.

"I've wanted to do that for quite some time now, but haven't had the courage."

I rested my head back against his shoulder, my face turned so my nose was resting in the hollow of his throat. I hummed happily.

"I think I could stay like this forever," I sighed.

"Me too."

I felt his lips against my temple and twined my fingers with his, our hands resting against my stomach. We were quiet for hours, just enjoying being so close. After a while, conversation picked back up again, and we were asking each other about favorite colors, movies we'd seen, music we listened to. It was only when the thirst became an unbearable burn in the back of my throat that we pulled ourselves apart and left to hunt.

We played our game again, laughing as we took down the different animals of the forest. This time, I pounced Jasper. Or rather, I tried. Seconds before I would have landed on his back he turned, catching me about the waist, sending us toppling through the undergrowth, laughing all the way. When we stopped, I was on top, my small hands clutching his shoulders.

"Gotcha!" I laughed, brushing my lips across his jaw.

His hands, which had gone to my hips when we landed, tightened slightly. I looked at him and my breathing stopped. His eyes, moments before the lovely color of an aged whiskey, were now dark with desire. They raked over me, stopping on my lips. His fingers tightened again as he moaned, low in his throat.

"Alice," the sound of his voice, thick with lust, sent a jolt straight to my center. I barely had a chance to register the rush of fluid between my legs before Jasper's lips were crushed to mine.

One hand tangled in my hair, the other went to the small of my back, holding me to him as he rolled us over. His weight pressed into me, his body fitted to mine, and I moaned as he deepened the kiss.

It wasn't frantic or rushed, as our last kiss had been, but it was still filled with passion and desire. Jasper had moved so he was resting between my legs, and I pulled one knee up over his hip, desperate for him to be closer to that throbbing part of my body. His hands were moving over me, one moving from my hair, to my face, up to my arm where our fingers met and tangled themselves together. The other moved from the small of my back, up my waist, to graze tentatively across the side of my breast. I cried out with pleasure at the sensation.

Jasper pulled away slightly, looking at me carefully.

"Is this all right, darlin'? You have to tell me if I'm doing something you don't want me to."

I only nodded, not trusting myself to speak, before pulling his face back to my own.

I kissed him with abandon, running my tongue along his lips and teeth, exploring the inside of his mouth, sucking his lower lip between my own, all the while eliciting little growls and moans from him that spurred me on. I let my hands roam over him, threading through his beautiful hair, down the slope of his back, and up the plains of his chest. I wanted more. More of him. More skin. Less clothes.

I began tugging at his shirt, not caring if I tore the fabric. His hands stilled mine, though, and I wondered if I had gone too far.

He kissed each of my hands, then kissed my lips briefly before pulling me up into a standing hug.

"Let's go home," he whispered huskily into my hair, eliciting a shiver from me. _Home._ I loved how it sounded on his tongue.

We ran home quickly, hand in hand, and when we got to my apartment I took the steps two at a time.

I walked through the door and turned to Jasper, suddenly hesitant. What if he had changed his mind? But he closed the distance before I could, bringing his lips to mine once more. This kiss was the slowest yet, but somehow it was the most heated. I felt like we were going to burn the house down around us; how could we not?

After several minutes, he placed his lips on my jaw, moving slowly to my neck. I fisted my hands in his hair, pulling him closer to me. He responded by increasing the pressure of his hands at the small of my back, lifting me up to him. He moved his lips to the hollow beneath my ear, running his tongue there and causing me to gasp his name. Moving his lips to my ear, he started whispering to me, causing my entire body to tremble.

"My life was empty until I found you, my love. For a man who experiences all the emotions of others, I never felt until I looked at you." He pressed his lips lightly to my ear before going on. "I love you, Alice, with everything that I am. You are the reason I was created. To be with you, to love you, to pleasure you. Let me, Alice. Let me love you, let me pleasure you; tonight, tomorrow, forever."

I was grateful he was supporting my weight, because I thought my knees would give out. He was tracing the shell of my ear with his tongue, making it very difficult to form a coherent thought. So, I said the one thing I thought I could manage.

"Yes," I whispered into him, clutching him tightly as he sucked my earlobe into his mouth, raking it gently with his teeth.

Before I knew, it we were flying across the living room. Jasper deposited me gently on a pile of cushions from the couch before returning to my mouth with renewed fervor. His hands were ghosting over my body, seemingly trying to touch everything at once. I arched into him, wanting more pressure behind the touches, needing to feel him.

Finally, he ran his hand down my leg, grabbing just above my knee, and lifted my leg up over his hip, like I had done before in the forest. He pressed his hips into the apex of my legs, causing a jolt of pleasure like nothing I'd ever known. My head dropped back, breaking the contact of our lips, and I moaned his name loudly. Moving his lips to my collarbone he thrust against me again, hissing my name as I moaned his again.

Our fingers were entwined above my head as our hips ground together. Not wanting to break that contact, I removed my free hand from his hair, trying to undo his buttons one-handed. It didn't work very well. I whimpered in frustration, getting ready to just tear the shirt, when I felt him smile against my neck.

"Alice, baby, is there something you want?"

His voice was so low, so husky, and drenched in such a twang that it caused a fresh flow of juices to my core.

"Off," I whimpered, tugging at his shirt. "Please."

He chuckled low in his throat, the reverberations going through my body causing me to moan again.

He sat up, and I whimpered at the loss of his weight on me. His eyes never left mine and he slowly undid one button, then another, all the way down his chest. I sat up, reaching out to touch the skin he was exposing. Kneeling before him, I ran my hands along the firmness of his chest, down his sculpted abdomen. I trailed a finger along the thin line of hair leading from his navel and disappearing into his trousers. A small hiss escaped him when I reached the button there and I looked up. He was watching me with eyes filled with hunger, lust, and love.

I ran both hands up his abdomen and chest, delighting in the feeling of his skin under my hands. I continued my hands up over his shoulders, then down his back, letting his shirt drop off his arms. I scooted slightly closer and leaned in, placing small open-mouthed kisses along his chest. I was rewarded with another small hiss, then a groan. I felt Jasper's fingers weave into my hair as I kissed back and forth across his chest. His other hand snaked under my chin, lifting my face up to his once more.

As his lips crushed against mine again, I felt his hands slither around to my back. I gasped against his mouth as he slid the zipper of my dress all the way down. Pulling from my mouth, he pushed the fabric off my shoulder, kissing the skin he exposed and eliciting another moan from me. He repeated the process on the other shoulder, before letting the dress drop, pooling around my knees.

I heard him groan softly and looked at him. He was staring at my body like he had just spent a week in the desert and I was a big glass of water. I watched him look at my breasts and lick his lips, sending another jolt between my legs.

Slowly, reverently, he reached out one hand and cupped my small breast, running his thumb across the nipple. My head fell back at the pleasure of it and we both moaned softly. My chest was heaving with the shallow breaths I was taking, causing my breasts to move against Jasper of their own accord.

Suddenly, something warm and wet and wonderful was surrounding my other breast. I cried out as Jasper flicked his tongue over my nipple again and again. Suddenly and without warning, the tightening in my lower abdomen shattered. I felt my eyes fly open, but I saw nothing but darkness interrupted by small flashes of light. The moistening between my legs increased yet again, drenching my thighs.

When I could focus again my eyes sought out Jasper.

"What was that?" I asked hoarsely.

"That, my love," he said with a smug smile, "was an orgasm."

"Oh," I said in a small voice. "That was…wonderful." Wonderful was by no means a strong enough adjective for what it was, but there were no words to describe it. I noticed that I was shaking all over and that we were lying back down against the couch cushions. Jasper was holding me against him, slowly tracing a line between my breasts down to my navel and back again with his fingers. He was watching my face, smiling down at me.

"Well, I'm glad you liked it, darlin'," he said with that same, slightly smug smile. "I plan on giving you a few more before we're done tonight."

His voice sent a tremor of anticipation through me. He was still smiling as he touched his lips lightly to mine, then moved them to my chin, along my jaw, and down my throat. He started kissing along the line he had been drawing with his fingers moments before, stopping long enough to circle around one nipple, then the other, his eyes locked on mine as he did so. I ran one hand through his hair, needing to touch him, and fisted the other one through mine. I was chewing on my lip and breathing rapidly as his lips ghosted over my navel, his tongue darting briefly in, before he continued down. Kneeling between my legs, he ran the tips of his fingers under the waistband of my underwear. His eyes darted up to mine, pleading.

"Can I touch you here, Alice," he asked me, his voice thick. "I won't if you ask me not to, but I want to taste you, baby."

I chewed my lip some more and nodded, not overly sure of what he meant by wanting to taste me, but knowing that I wanted his attention down there more than I had ever wanted anything. I lifted my hips to aid him in removing my last garment, hissing in pleasure as his fingers brushed my inner thighs. Softly, Jasper placed kisses starting half way up my thigh, working his way down past my knee to my ankle, before moving to the other ankle and working his way back up, his eyes never leaving mine. I was wound so tightly now that I felt I might come apart at his slightest touch. I was trembling uncontrollably, a constant litany of whines, whimpers, and moans escaping my lips.

"Shh," Jasper breathed softly, sending a stream of cool air across my center, causing me to groan. He placed one hand on the flat of my stomach, rubbing his thumb in small circles there. "Relax, love," he told me gently. Then his face moved forward, his eyes still not leaving mine, and I realized what he meant by tasting me a moment before he made contact.

As his tongue gently came in contact with my folds, I broke to pieces again. The world went black and I felt my body arch up into Jasper as I came apart at the seams. It was so powerful, so much more so than before, that I worried I would never be put together again.

I blinked slowly, the room coming back into focus, and heard the soft sound of Jasper's laughter.

"You're making this too easy, sweetheart," he whispered against me, sending a new course of shivers through me. "But I'm afraid I wanted a bit more of a taste than that."

With that, he lowered his mouth back to my core, causing me to scream his name wildly. The upper part of my body bucked and thrashed as his tongue slowly teased me up to new heights, but his hands kept my hips still. I fisted my hands into my hair and thrashed my head back and forth, the feelings building up inside of me so wonderful, so unlike anything I had ever felt.

His mouth began to pick up speed, and he was sucking on me, flicking his tongue against me, and driving me insane. I hardly noticed as he removed one hand from my hips until I felt the most delicious filling sensation in my core. My brain put two and two together, and I wasn't sure if it was the idea or the act of Jasper putting his fingers inside me while his mouth and tongue tortured me into oblivion that sent me over the edge again.

When I was able to focus again, Jasper had his head resting on my stomach and was watching me with an adoring expression.

"Did you enjoy that?" he asked smugly.

Growling low in my throat, I reached down and dragged him up to me, crushing my lips to his. There was another taste on his mouth this time, something sweet and slightly familiar. With a jolt, I realized that I was tasting my own juices on his lips, and this caused the spring in my abdomen to coil tighter. I dropped my hands to the waist of Jasper's pants, struggling with the button. His hands joined mine, and his pants were off and across the room in less than a second.

Looking down between us, I licked my lips at the sight before me, causing Jasper to groan loudly. I had never seen a penis before, so I really didn't have anything to compare it to, but laying there with it pressed against my belly, it looked quite large. Before I could think about it any further, Jasper's lips were pressed to mine and I felt him shift, placing himself at my entrance.

He broke our kiss, looking at me hesitantly.

"Alice, darlin', are you sure this is what you want? Because if you don't, we can stop now."

I shook my head, pressing my lips to his again.

"I love you, Jasper," I said softly. "Make love to me. Please."

He groaned softly, kissed me again, the slowly pressed into me, watching my face the entire time.

It was like nothing else I had ever felt before. I felt my eyes open even wider and my breathing increase. When Jasper was fully sheathed within me, I sighed a small, "Oh."

Slowly, gently, we moved together. I locked my legs around Jasper's waist and my arms around his neck, wanting to pull him closer. He had one hand on my bottom, the other braced above my head. Being connected in this way was so wonderful, so natural. The way I pulled around him, the way he felt within me, I knew in that moment we were made to fit together in this way.

As Jasper moved within me and I rocked my hips to his rhythm, I felt the coil tightening within me. We were moving together, moaning together, touching together. In that moment, it was Jasper and I in the world alone.

Our paces picked up and our breathing grew more ragged. I could tell I was getting close to falling over the edge again. I whimpered as Jasper moved one leg from around his waist to over his shoulder, increasing the intensity of the sensations I was feeling.

"Jasper," I whimpered. "Oh, god!"

"Come on, baby," he whispered hoarsely. "Come on."

That did it. I was thrown over the edge like a ball from a cannon. The stars flashed around me, and I felt myself tighten around Jasper's length within me. I cried out his name again and again, and felt as he tensed above me, heard as he called my name on a choked breath.

When I opened my eyes again, Jasper was collapsed on top of me. Placing a kiss on my cheek, he rolled over, pulling me with him, so he was on his back and I was pressed tight to his side. It seemed as though every nerve in my body was alive and buzzing. My ears were ringing. It was an amazing sensation.

"That was…." I whispered into Jasper's chest, trailing off when I couldn't find a word strong enough to do justice to what we just experienced.

"Yeah," Jasper chuckled, tracing small random patterns on my back with his fingers. "It was."

I smiled against his chest and looked up at him. His eyes were closed and there was a perfect, content smile spreading across his face. It was the largest smile I had ever seen on him. _I did that_, a smug little voice inside my head said.

Propping up on my elbow, I looked down at him and pressed a quick kiss to his mouth. He opened one eye.

"Hmmm…" he hummed, half question, half statement.

"Let's do that again," I said, with a huge grin on my face.


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own this song, nor do I have any rights to it. I am only using it because I love it so and it is such a kick ass song. No copyright infringement intended.

For Your Eyes Only

Sheena Easton

For your eyes only, can see me through the night.  
For your eyes only, I never need to hide.  
You can see so much in me, so much in me that's new.  
**I never felt until I looked at you.**

For your eyes only, only for you.  
You'll see what no one else can see, and now I'm breaking free.  
For your eyes only, only for you.  
The love I know you need in me, the fantasy you've freed in me.  
Only for you, only for you.

For your eyes only, the nights are never cold.  
You really know me, that's all I need to know.  
Maybe I'm an open book because I know you're mine,  
But you won't need to read between the lines.

For your eyes only, only for you.  
You see what no one else can see, and now I'm breaking free.  
For your eyes only, only for you.  
The passions that collide in me, the wild abandoned side of me.  
Only for you, for your eyes only.


End file.
